awakening
   


In the Flow


The Gift of Giving

with Dr. Graham Williams


Dr. Graham Williams    

A regular column exploring the benefits of meditation

Every time you feel good you will find that your senses are open.
You are in touch with your body and with all of the life around you. This is the gift we have all been given – this gift of life. Our senses are aware of everything that is happening all the time. They can’t not be aware. However, we can choose to ignore them, which we do most of the time.

We do this because we are looking out for number one, and we don’t realise that this is a rather anxious business. When you do this you always have to be on guard. And this means that there is always an undercurrent of fear and worry about not getting what you want, or if you do, of losing it. It gets really exhausting!

When we allow ourselves to be open to our senses – to our bodies, to other people, and the life around us – it balances the tendency we have to lock ourselves up in our plans and concerns. To be locked in the cage of thought which closes our minds. It’s not possible to be thinking about ourselves and our immediate concerns and to be in touch with our bodies at the same time. Once we get caught in thought, we literally lose our senses. And so we switch off from the world around us.

Our emotions then get caught between what we are thinking about and how we feel about that, and what our senses are experiencing. Our senses can’t stop, they just keep picking up everything that is happening in our world. We then become emotionally unbalanced, and so leave ourselves open to all the unpleasant and unhealthy states which come from that, like anxiety and worry.

Opening to your senses is a gift, both to yourself and to everyone and everything around you. It’s a gift which comes from having a body and being able to be – to live and be receptive to all the input we receive. It’s a gift which you can give to yourself and to everyone else. Why is this?

When you are open to the awareness of your senses there in no time or need for fear because you don’t have to look out for number one. You simply don’t have the time to think about it. Life is too interesting and your natural curiosity opens up.

This is a gift which you give to yourself each time you do this. In actual fact it is simply recognising the natural state which we inherit with our bodies – the radiant state of awareness which is the basis of our consciousness and our bodies. We enlighten ourselves and give this as a gift to others when we recognise and respect the natural radiance of their lives.

In as sense it’s a form of active listening – being prepared to actually listen to your own body and what other people are saying. This is giving the time and space to hear and feel the reality of your own life and the reality of the people with whom you live.

Sharing your life with others is a direct act of generosity, because it allows and opens communication, free from the fears which cause us to hide ourselves. When you are prepared to see someone, listen to what they are saying and feel what their bodies are communicating, then you are giving yourself to them.

This is an extremely practical way to free yourself from the undercurrent of fear which tends to run through all of our self-obsessed emotional states. Being open, keeping your mind in touch with your body, being prepared to give your time and energy to others and to the issues and situations which are part and parcel of our lives, builds a real sense of confidence.

Over and over with students and clients, I have found that when I listen in this way it is the vital key which opens them to hearing what they themselves are saying and feeling. It’s as if the gift of active listening in itself is almost enough to help someone become aware of what they need to face in themselves or do.

Saying a mantra, I have found, is one of the best ways of opening yourself to active listening. It clears the mind from its closed-circuit conversations, and allows you to listen with your body and your heart. The one I have found to be most useful for this purpose is the mantra designed to keep you in touch with your heart, to feel warmth towards yourself and others, and to be completely open to others. This is the mantra OM MANI PADME HUM.
Or you might just like to use a short phrase like, BE OPEN, or single words like LISTEN or OPENNESS, to help you be open to giving.

When you are open and curious, wanting to get involved and engage with what is happening, you move forward, and in doing this you give yourself to the person or situation you are moving towards. This act of giving yourself is also an act of confidence – that powerful force which takes you beyond your own perceived limitations and opens up strengths, abilities and possibilities that you never realized you were capable of. It takes you out of yourself and moves you, so that you experience what is meant by the Zen saying that the action does itself rather than you doing it. This is what it feels like when you give yourself and your energy completely to something.

Giving then becomes a gift – a gift to yourself, to all the people in your life and the life around you – as it frees you from fear and opens you to the natural radiance of your mind and body.

 

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